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Through the years we all learn little life lessons, but many times we
forget the lesson and end up hurting ourselves or others, making the
same mistakes, lose sleep over silly things or just take minutes off
our lives by stressing needlessly. There are some “rules” that I try to
live by when I take the time to think of them and applying the “rules”
has made me a happier person and has made my life much easier to live.
One rule is that story of the man who whined because he had no shoes
until he saw the man with no feet. I use this one a lot. No matter how
bad you think you have it, chances are very high that someone has it
worse than you do at that time. It’s ok to feel sorry for yourself,
it’s only natural, but let it go quick. Don’t hold on to self pity too
long because you are wasting time that could be spent making things
better.
If I start feeling like I have it bad, I think of
people like the Holocaust survivors or parents who are sitting by their
child’s hospital bed while the child is dying from cancer and then my
whining over a breakup or losing my tickets to a football game becomes
embarrassing.
Another one of my thoughts of self-help is to never jump to conclusions unless you know the facts.
When
I was 18 or 19 I was working in a factory. One woman that worked with
us didn’t show up for a few days and one morning some idiot supervisor
told the woman’s nephew “You tell your aunt to get her ass in here or
she is fired”. He said it in front of the whole crew and I know he felt
like a big man at the time.
That night after work the woman’s
nephew went to her house to find out what was up and found his aunt
shot execution style next to her bed and her 6 year old son shot in the
head on their couch. Her boyfriend had done it. When I heard about it
the next day, all I could think about is that ass of a supervisor, and
they way he acted like such an asshole the day before.
A lot
of us are quick to jump to a conclusion before thinking that there
might just be a legitimate explanation than a person doing what they
are doing just to piss us off. Even on the road I give the benefit of
doubt to other drivers. Yeah, it is really a pain to be cut off, but
maybe that person just got back from their mother’s funeral, or on
their way home from the doctor’s office after finding out they have a
life threatening illness. Who knows? For a few seconds of frustration,
I just usually shake it off and continue on my way. There is no point
in getting pissed and flipping the person off. It isn’t usually worth
the stress.
One other thing that I keep in mind is to remember
that we all have egos and we need to keep them in check and not let
them control our life.
The ego is something we all are born
with and many times we let it dictate our happiness or our pain. It
comes down to “I want”. I want this, I want that, I want her to like
me, I want him to treat me with respect, I want to eat at a restaurant
in peace with no kids running around, I want people to move out of my
way when I am on the road and so on.
My father used to tell me
“The world doesn’t spin around your ass Johnnie”. Obviously it didn’t
but like any other child I wanted things my way. It’s nice to make
yourself the center of your universe, but it is silly to expect
everyone else live in your universe.
The ego wants to satisfy
itself by any means necessary and will make us do stupid things to get
that satisfaction. The most prevalent I see are romantic relationships.
Man, I have seen some stupid stuff. For some reason a lot of people
think the NEED to have a partner so they spend way too much time trying
to get one.
This could actually be a whole other discussion,
but what drives people to spend so much time, effort and even money to
seek out a relationship? What would drive a woman to put her life in
danger and her children in danger to be with a man who she knew was
physically abusive before they marry, but marry him anyway? Then be
surprised when he abuses her? Or what would drive a man to leave his
wife and children for another woman and then be surprised when that
woman cheats on him with another married man?
Anyway, it is
the ego and it is something that I try to remind myself every time I
feel the need to want. Desire is like a drug and the addiction is much
easier because you don’t need to search for desire, it is already
inside you. But it can cause as much and sometimes even more damage to
your life than a drug addiction.
One quick one is, it doesn't
matter how much information you know, it's knowing where to find that
information that matters more. Keeping too much crap inside your brain
is fine, but life is a lot more easier if you just know where to find
the information you need rather than taking up too much time trying to
soak it all in. That is obviously not something that many will agree
with, but it is something I use because it has made my life easier.
Those are a few of my personal thoughts that help me keep my life
flowing in a more enjoyable way. There are a few more, but I have
written a book here
Of course I am close
to being human so I obviously keep making mistakes, but I have made
less than I use to when I was younger. Life is really easy to do, all
you have to do is breathe, and that's a no brainer. But sometimes you
have to deal and dealing is what gets us into trouble. |
| | Posted 9/20/2006 4:03 PM - 1 View - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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